Resources to support you after the death of a loved one, including what to do and where to get support.
Firstly, we at the Royal Melbourne Hospital (RMH) would like to acknowledge your recent loss. Please accept our deepest sympathy.
The death of someone close to you can be very distressing, particularly when it happens in hospital.
Add to that the responsibility for making funeral arrangements and putting the person’s affairs in order, and the experience can feel overwhelming.
We have have some information below that we hope will be helpful to you at this difficult time.
What to do after someone dies
Here are some resources on next steps, including registering the death and planning a funeral:
To access a deceased patient's medical records, the senior available next of kin can submit a Freedom of Information (FOI) request to our FOI office.
Requests must include written authorisation and evidence that demonstrates that they are the senior available next of kin.
Grieving a loved one
Grief is a normal and natural response to loss. Grief allows you to gradually adjust to your loss and find a way to go on with your life without the person who has died.
Everyone experiences grief in their own way. It can affect every part of your life.
- Feelings: you may feel shock, sadness, anger, guilt, loneliness, or you may just feel numb. You may also have a sense of relief and a feeling of acceptance
- Thoughts: you may experience confusion and disbelief. You may be preoccupied with the person who has died, dreaming about them or having a sense of their presence. You might also try not to think about them, avoiding things that remind you of them. It’s common to think you will never get over the loss
- Physical reactions: you may experience changes to sleep patterns and appetite, as well as tiredness, nausea or pain. See your doctor if these symptoms persist
- Behaviours: you may have no energy at all or feel like you need to do everything at once. You may find yourself wanting to withdraw from social situations
Grieving is different for everyone
There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Some people express their grief in private and do not show it in public. Some people express their grief through crying and talking while others may be reluctant to talk.
People may behave differently at different times. Members of the same family can grieve differently so it is important to respect each other’s way of grieving.
- Try to be patient with yourself. Don’t expect too much too soon
- Try not to make big life decisions too soon
- Try to avoid isolating yourself from friends and family. Find someone with whom you feel comfortable talking
- Allow people to help you – you will be able to help someone else at another time
Bereavement counselling
Bereavement counselling allows you to explore your feelings and adjust to life after the loss of your loved one.
It can be a great comfort and support during a difficult time.
The Compassionate Friends Victoria (TCFV)
Free, peer-led grief support for parents, siblings and grandparents across Victoria
24-hour telephone crisis support service is available to anyone needing emotional support
Telephone and online support, information and referral service, helping men to deal with relationship problems in a practical and effective way
Free, private and confidential telephone and online counselling service for young people aged 5 to 25
Information brochures
Download information on grief and bereavement support in your preferred language:
Memorial services
The RMH hosts quarterly memorial services at our Multi-faith Sacred Space to honour patients who have died at hospital.
The family of the patient will be invited to attend. Contact Spiritual Care for more information:
300 Grattan St, Parkville, Victoria